The pain of rating 'le pain' -- le tough job, but someone has to do it, oui?

Photo illustration by Lisa Christensen

By Lisa Christensen

October 27, 2008 | As a self-proclaimed connoisseur of french bread, the task of reviewing the four main types of french bread readily available in the valley seemed no problem at all. I didn't even think I needed to go out and buy a loaf of each of the four store brands because I knew this like the back of my hand. As it turned out, however, it was a good thing I did as there turned out to be a surprise or two. So, here it is, the Cache Valley roundup of that oh-so-Americanized version of Provençal bread we all know and love.

Albertson's. Advertised as being hot and fresh at 4 p.m. daily, Albertson's bakery offers both white and wheat french bread. As the other three types came only in the white version, that's what I got. The Albertson's bread has a crispy crust that isn't too thick or flaky or hard to chew. It was, however, the hardest to cut of the four, probably due to the bottom crust being the softest. The middle was soft and flavorful, somehow almost egg-y tasting, despite it containing no eggs. I know this because the bread came with nutritional information. Most of the ingredients are normal, everyday things like flour and water and yeast but there are, as expected, some unpronounceable things towards the end like L-cysteine hydrochloride, whatever that is.

As far as nutrition goes, each serving (2 oz. or about 1/8 of the 1-lb. loaf) contains 130 calories, 1g of fat (no saturated or trans fat), 250 mg sodium, 27 g carbohydrates, 1 g fiber and 5g protein, so it's really not something that's going to kill you right away. Slower than that Wonder White Bread everyone's so fond of, anyway.

Smith's. All they had when I went shopping was day-old bread and it wasn't even marked down, giving it an immediate point loss. However, it soon redeemed itself, the middle being light and airy with almost a fluffy cake-like texture. It was almost devoid of flavor, though, which would make it a great sub sandwich bread but not a great side dish. The crust was probably my favorite of the four, being somewhat thick and chewy, uniform on top and bottom in crustiness, making it pretty easy to both cut and tear. Because of this, it is probably the easiest to quickly serve or just to snack on.

It, too, included nutritional info, containing just 4 main pronounceable ingredients with 170 calories per 1/8 loaf, 1g fat, 310mg. sodium, 10mg potassium, 34g carbohydrates, 1g sugar and 5g protein. It is important to note, however, that although the Smith's and Albertson's breads weigh the same amount, the Smith's loaf is substantially larger, probably due to it's lighter, airier nature.

Wal-Mart. I must confess, I went into this with a heavy prejudice against Wal-Mart french bread. I remember it as being a pasty, tasteless blob masquerading as some kind of bread-y substance. I love french bread (clearly) but couldn't bring myself to finish the loaf. So I was surprised when I opened up this bag of bread. Inside was...well, bread. I took a bite. It was edible! Sing praises, they changed the recipe! What was even more surprising was that it tasted exactly like Albertson's. Seriously, I did a blind-fold test and I couldn't tell the difference between the middles. They both have the same texture and taste. The only difference is the crust. Wal-Mart's has a somewhat chewier crust while still being crusty, making it much easier to cut. I

t had no nutritional information but I would guess that the caloric content, etc., is pretty darn close to Albertson's, what with them tasting exactly the same and all.

Lee's. This was the one I was looking forward to. Just as I admitted my previous prejudice against Wal-Mart's bread, I will admit that I have long held Associated Foods (of which Lee's is a part) in high esteem as far as french bread goes. In fact, my first taste of french bread came from another AF store, Soelberg's in Grantsville. So it's a pretty near and dear carbohydrate to my heart, yes. Despite this, however, I tried to be a good little journalist and be as objective as possible.

The crust was flaky and crisp and yet easy to bite, but it was a little messy. The inside had a more substantial, meaty quality, mildly flavorful without being too heavy. It was easy to both cut and tear, though I confess not much of the former got done as I kept tearing off little chunks to munch on. For some reason, it made me feel very much like Belle in the opening scenes of "Beauty and the Beast." I have to recommend eating this bread with a flavorful, somewhat tart apple such as Roma or Cameo and maybe a little mild cheese. Absolutely divine.

Ranking

This was the hard part. Unlike I had thought, there were no clear winners or losers. They were all good. So know that ranking these was incredibly difficult and they were all really close. The order could be changed depending on the desired use of the bread (as a side dish, sandwich bread, etc.), but this is for general eating purposes:

1. Lee's - $1.59 (because anything that makes me want to sing and say "Bonjour" to everyone I see can't be bad, right?)
2. Smith's - $1.50 (the crust gave it that little edge)
3. Wal-Mart - 98 cents 4. Albertson's - $1.69 (keep in mind that Wal-Mart and Albertson's was really a tie because they're practically the same bread but I liked the crust on Wal-Mart's just a little better. Also, for being the same bread, Wal-Mart's is significantly cheaper)

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