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Where are the fairy tales about
getting into law school?
By Shannon
Johnson
September 15, 2008 | If anybody sees me in a field
at night dressed in rags and waiting by a pumpkin, don't
suspect anything. I am not crazy. I am waiting for my
fairy godmother.
We've all heard the story of Cinderella. She receives
plenty of magical assistance by just being there. Huh,
how fair is that? She has a fairy godmother, gets a
big puffy dress, and marries a handsome prince just
because she can't go to party that she's been invited
to.
If you were ever a little girl, or walked close enough
to a movie theater, Disney's fog has enveloped you.
When you woke up three weeks later you remember the
neatly animated tales of Snow White and Cinderella while
overlooking the glaring inconsistencies.
Because we've all fallen prey to that dangerous little
Mickey Mouse, we should remember that our helpless heroine
leaves her glass slipper at the ball. In spite of the
fact that all of the other magic melted away the slipper
stayed. Her carriage becomes a pumpkin, dress becomes
rags, but the slipper stays. Maybe she should have taken
off the dress so she could hang onto it too.
This is a typical issue that I have with fairy tales,
if you're going to have magic, that's fine, but at least
follow your own magical rules. If that shoe hadn't proven
to be the exception to every magic rule, that still
applied to the rest of her attire, the prince wouldn't
have assaulted the abnormally large feet of every other
women in his kingdom. Didn't the prince look at Cinderella
and something in the cockles of his brain that should
have echoed recognition? Did he mutter to himself, "hmmmm
you look exactly like this girl but I won't know until
I see the foot."
Primarily the problem with Cinderella is why is she
willing to use this fabulous wish simply to go to the
ball and be one in hundreds of women attempting to win
over an implicitly dull or at least oblivious prince?
Marriage is the way she solved her problem rather
then focusing her energy on, I don't know, running away
or getting her father's estate back from the clutches
of her evil-stepmother.
No, the way Cinderella saves herself is with her defiance
of her stepfamily to go to the ball to get married.
Not that marriage is a bad thing, but it seems that
in every fairy tale the stars must align to help her
find the handsome prince.
In choosing an entirely unrelated example, the are
no magic stories about a girl who receives some magical
assistance in getting into law school.
That would be an excellent fairy tale.
I guess the real question is where is my magic? My
12-year-old princess fantasy has proven tough to abandon.
Part of growing up includes: moving out, acknowledging
that no maid cleans up the dishes, and that socks are
key to increase the time between doing the laundry.
Our lives seem much more of the drudgery in the early
part of Cinderella's tale with less and less of the
magic.
I am not even asking for a dress, just some singing
mice to help with the dishes and weekly chores. Maybe
that's what happens: I want magic, But I only want to
fit it in the confines of my life, and I want logic
to be inversely applied to these doe-eyed heroines.
By now most of you have probably tried to tell me
in the confines of your mind that they are just stories.
If they are just stories shouldn't the message be
better?
Truly, I know that a little magic to help Snow White
gain favor with the people and ostracize her stepmother
is not as glamorous as the poisoned-apple kiss-of-life
plot, but I think the former would have left the people
better off.
Ultimately, isn't that the goal to have these girls
become rulers. It really doesn't instill confidence
in their governing when they can't even stand up to
an overbearing stepmother.
]Is it too much to ask that one princess be an excellent
speaker, always do her homework or be good at Monopoly?
Can't she be anything other than whimsically beautiful,
perfect wife material, and have a tendency for spontaneously
break into song?
By the way, where does the prince in Snow White come
from? In my experience, there is usually only one monarch
per kingdom. Was it a common practice for other nation's
princes to go wandering through other countries? The
only other prince around would have been her relative.
I really hope Snow White was not rescued by her brother.
NW
MS |
